Fuckin Togo's.

Man, fuck Togo's.

I'm cooped up in this hotel room all day, counting down the minutes until free drink time (210 minutes exactly as I type this), and I decide I'm gonna grab my book (The Fountainhead...so good through 50 pages) and head down to the pool. But it's 1pm and I haven't eaten anything (The Old Man told me that the free breakfast went till 10:30, so when I go down there at 10 and I'm told that on weekdays it actually ends at 9:30, my morning was fucking ruined. Ruined.) besides an apple and I'm really damn hungry, you know?

So I walk out the hotel here in lovely Arcadia and take in my surroundings. I got a Tony Roma's and a BJ's. A Starbucks and a sushi place. And a Togo's. Now, I haven't been to a Togo's in years. I strongly considered BJ's, but I long ago learned the lesson to avoid that place at all costs. The food is terrible and I always find myself sitting there thinking, "Why the fuck did I come here AGAIN?" Right, beer. But for a brewery/restaurant, their beer sure is terrible.

So I decide on Togo's. As I walked in, I knew I had made a mistake. The dude behind the counter was just some stoner fuck who couldn't give two shits about making a nice sandwich. It's not his fault, though. I'm not really complaining about him. If you go into a chain sandwich place, you know you're getting a stoner who doesn't care about your sandwich.

Initial complaints: That menu is bare. There are hardly any choices. There are no prices. Nothing is prominently displayed. There is no listing of standard and available fixings. It's the worst menu I've ever seen.

Anyhow, I look at the menu. There are literally like 8 sandwiches in all. Three are vegetarian: "Cucumber and Avocado," "Cheese and Avocado," and "Cheese."

I hate avocado with all that is holy, so that leaves me one option.

I go with the cheese sammich. It's easily the worst sandwich I've ever eaten. I don't like mayo, so every time I order a sammich, I order extra mustard. I never have a problem, but the dude takes this to mean I want a gallon of mustard on my sandwich.

And here is why it's Togo's fault:

They have these super high counters that extend over the sandwich making counter so that you can't see your sandwich being made. I don't see the gallon of mustard being poured onto my sandwich. Honestly, it must have been pooled on there. The bread was completely soaked with mustard. The veggies and cheese were thoroughly saturated with mustard. It was revolting.

This high counter also prevented me from noticing that the guy put about a pound of cheese on my sammich. This may be hard for people who love meat to understand, but when I order a cheese sandwich, the cheese does NOT serve as a substitute for meat. Honestly it was about 2 inches thick of cheese. Of course this is more easily fixable than the mustard, it's obnoxious nonetheless. I don't like biting into a block of cheese anymore than the next guy not named Jeff Sample.

Why these high ass counters? I recall the last time I WAS in a Togo's they had this very same setup. I assume it's standard.

I'm already bored with this. The veggies were wilty. There's not enough vegetables. Bell Peppers...would it be so hard to have some god damn bell peppers? And it's expensive as hell. $9.68 for a terrible sammich, a small drink, and a tiny ass bag of Lay's?

Man, fuck Togo's.